WAR OF THE HAIRCUTS: Trump takes another devastating blow

North Korea is celebrating today after successfully testing an intercontinental ballistic missile (ICBM) which Kim Jong Un says “can reach anywhere in the world and at least my hair has some kind of style, Trump can’t do anything with that grey mist that hovers over him”.

Tuesday morning saw the launch of the missile which reached an altitude of 2,802km (1,731 miles) and flew 933km before hitting a target in the Sea of Japan. It is believed this is a reaction to a statement weeks ago in which Trump said Kim had hair like a melted lego piece.

Japan’s Minister of Foreign Affairs has responded to launch this morning stating:

Shove your missile up your arse, North Korea, and keep us out of it. The Japanese have effortlessly cool hair no matter what. We will not suffer because we have style. Get your missile out our sea and fuck off.”

Trump took to Twitter this morning to condemn the launch saying:

Does this guy have nothing better to do? Maybe China can sort his hair out. Get a hairdresser there who can turn his hair the right way round. It’s sideways for God’s sake.”

Back In January when North Korea were making final preparations for testing an ICBM and Kim said Trump looked like he was haunted by his own hair, it is thought a launch and another jibe against Trump’s hair, would be considered a game-changer.

The world waits with baited breath to see how this course of events will play out on an international scale.

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